Thankful. . .

Ok, so I've been away from the blog WAY too long and I've neglected my blog longer than I ever intended to. The reason. Sickness. Germs. And more sickness. We're going on four (4) weeks of this. No joke. And I've got to tell you, I'm sick of being sick. Collectively, we've had ear infections, sinus infections, more ear infections, borderline upper respiratory infections, etc. Enough!!! Don't even get me started on the sleepless nights. Anyway, that is the reason for the neglect on the blog. Let's move on and post something positive on this Thanksgiving night.

We host Thanksgiving at our home every year and on occasion we are blessed to have my mother-in-law Bonnie visiting from the east coast. This was one of those years! She arrived last Friday so we've been enjoying her company all week. This was her first time meeting Wesley, so it was a very special visit. In addition to my family and my mother-in-law, we had our dear friends Jose and Shannon over who we consider family. Jose and Shannon graciously provided yummy appetizers including champagne while my mom made some awesome soup, and my lovely hubs did the rest of the cooking.

Here he is in all his glory. The bird looks burnt but it's not, it's the dry rub - mmmm!

Here is my mom enjoying a pina colada from a fresh coconut courtesy of Jose. OMG!

My brother J and his son Brooks

Wesley and his cousin Brooks hanging out. Two of the cutest boys in the world!!!

Mom, Dad, Nanie (a.k.a. Brian's mom) and Brian pose for the camera.

Me and Nanie

Jose and Wesley having fun

Me and "The Chef" Brian

These two look like they're going to get into some trouble!

Hey, how did this guy get to be at the head of the Thanksgiving table?

Me and my little peanut

It's times like this that we reflect on the past year and think about what we are thankful for. Well, this year I didn't have to even think about it. He's here. He's FINALLY here. After seven (7) years of trying to become a family of three (3) versus a family of two (2) we've finally made it! I'm reminded of the day that we told my parents that we weren't going to "try" for a biological child any longer. It was extremely difficult. Possibly the most difficult thing I've ever had to say to my parents. And my dad said to me, "Sometimes God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers." God does have a plan for us.

So, on this Thanksgiving night here is my top 10 (not in order) list of things I am thankful for:

1. Wesley - I know that this child was meant to be with our family. In the short amount of time he's been with us, he's touched so many people and he's filled my heart with so much joy. I couldn't see my life without him. I love you Peanut. :)
2. Brian - I couldn't imagine going on this journey with anyone else. You are my traveling companion, my love, my life. You are an amazing father and I love you.
3. My parents - I feel so blessed to have two wonderful people that I look up to and enjoy spending time with. You are inspirational, crazy at times and awesome grandparents to Wesley.
4. Family - my mother-in-law, my brother, my aunts and uncles, I love you all and appreciate the love and support you have given me, Brian and now Wesley.
4. Friends - I wouldn't pick any other people to surround me with the love, support, laughs and friendship that you have. You are like family to me. :)
5. Lesley @ Across the World Adoption Agency - I'm so thankful for her listening to me vent about our China adoption one evening in May, 2009; the conversation turned to her referring us to our agency and the Korea program. If it weren't for her, I don't know if things would have turned out the way they did and I credit her with putting us on the path to find our son.
6. Adoptive mom friends - it's been said before by myself and many others but unless you have been through the adoption process (or are in it) you can't really understand it all. It is a roller coaster ride. There are good times. There are difficult times. There are times that words can't even describe. Having other moms that have "been there, done that" has been incredible and invaluable.
7. Reality TV - although we watch less TV now that our little peanut is home, we still make time for reality TV. I love it. The Real Housewives (Atlanta, Orange County, New York), Project Runway, Millionaire Matchmaker, American Idol and so many more. The trashy ones are the best. They take me to another place and help me to forget about my work day, stresses, etc. The trashier the better.
8. Naps - although they are few and far between these days (only weekends and only if we don't have plans) I am thankful for naps to catch up on lost sleep which seems to be the case these days. Just when you think you're having a good month sleep-wise with Wesley, things take a turn.
9. Spanx - If you've ever worn these you know why I'm thankful. Enough said.
10. Music - I've written about my affinity for music before so this shouldn't be a surprise. I'm happy to report that Wesley loves music. We have it on in the house all the time. He bounces to it and is starting to clap as well. He falls asleep to Beatles Bedtime (Beatles songs in lullaby format). A world without music is a sad, sad world in my book.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Halloween

All three of us have been sick this week with a nasty cold that's been going around (thank you daycare) and mine unfortunately turned into a sinus infection. So, hence the late Halloween post. Without furter adieu. . .

We kicked off our Halloween with carving our pumpkin the day before and putting some finishing touches on our decor outside. The weather has been wild here with rain one day then mid 70 degree weather the next. Needless to say a lot of the Halloween decorations weren't doing so hot in our neighborhood after the last rain. In past year's, Brian and I would buy two pumpkins and we would both carve but this year we decided to just get one big one and Brian handled the dirty work.

Wesley got the biggest kick out of watching his Daddy carve the pumpkin, but what was an even bigger hit was when we let him stick his hands in the "pumpkin guts" afterward.






We invited my parents over on Sunday for dinner and to participate in Wesley's first Halloween. The yummy chili that we had cooking in the crock pot all day filled the house with an amazing aroma. The Giant's game was on that night as well (World Series) so my dad was basically going to be glued to the television once the game started. After we all ate dinner (no chili for Wesley) it was time to hold our breathe and put on the Halloween costume. We really weren't sure what the reaction from Wesley was going to be. . .

Our little monkey with his Daddy.

Ummm, did you happen to see the banana sticking out the right side of the costume?

We couldn't get a good picture of him standing in the costume or sitting for that matter. Poor kid looks miserable. . .

OK - I'm ready for some SERIOUS Trick-or-Treating!


Wesley, my mom and I headed out for a little bit of Trick-or-Treating and left Dad and Brian home to answer the door and watch the Giant's game. The first stop was to visit a house around the corner where my friend Jenn (and her family) live. After we visited them for a bit, we hit a few houses on our street where we knew the neighbors. By the time we got to the third house, Wesley got the hang of reaching into the candy bucket and pulling out candy. Unfortunately, he then threw the candy to the ground - but hey baby steps, right? He was really "into" it and being out when it was dark with some house being decorated scarily didn't bother him one bit. The kid has no fear. We headed home after awhile because I was carrying him most of the way (all 30 pounds of him), it was getting late and we were fighting the beginning stages of our colds.

Too bad he couldn't eat any of the candy he scored. Until next year. . .

The (a little late) Versatile Blogger Award

Well, first I must apologize for the tardiness of this post. My adoptive mom (and blogger) friend Michelle gave me the Verstile Blogger Award at the beginning of October and I'm just NOW getting around to thanking her and passing it on. So Michelle my friend, "Thank you" and hopefully you know that I look forward to the day that our families get together to meet. You were a huge cheerleader for me in the months leading up to traveling to Seoul and it helped tremendously.



About the versatile blogger award:
- You thank and link back to the person who gave you the award.
- Share 7 things about yourself.
- Pass the award along to 7 other bloggers that you think are great!

7 Things About Me:
1. I've wanted to adopt since I was very young. Apparently I shared with my mom that "When I grow up, I wanted to have a family with a child from every country." Country #1 - China (paperwork has been there almost 3 1/2 years), country #2 - South Korea!

2. If I was a guy, I'd be in a band. Not just any band, a ROCK band. During our China wait, my husband suggested that I "get a hobby" to pass the time. I've always wanted to learn to play the guitar. That year for my birthday, he bought me an acoustic guitar. For the next 2 years I took lessons.

3. If money were no object, I'd love to buy some land and open a winery. Now, don't get me wrong, I know NOTHING about wine-making. But, the idea of talking to people (and pouring/tasting) about the wine all day in a beautiful setting is appealing to me. There are some wonderful wineries not far from where we live and I just think it would be/could be a blast (I'm sure it's a lot of hard work).

4. I have never (just knocked on my hardwood floors) broken a bone in my body. I've had plenty of sprains, strains, pulls, what-have-you, but no broken bones. Been on crutches, worn plenty of ace bandages, but no casts. . .

5. I LOVE lists. Now, this just doesn't mean "organizing" lists. Although, I do need them to get through a work day/week and now, I need them in my personal life. I'm also a big fan of "Top 100 Best Songs of XXXX" type lists. If you ever read/saw the movie "High Fidelity" - I'm all about it! Not THAT bad, but LOVE the lists.

6. Music is very important to me. I love all kinds of music from reggae to rock to jazz to rap and everything in between. I worked in radio for 9 years before going into the advertising agency world so I was blessed to be exposed to some interesting people and music. And, I love making custom mixes for people - many "special" people in my life have received a "Mix Master Mich" special. :)

7. The road that led us to our sweet Wesley hasn't been an easy one but it has been a journey, an experience with my loving, understanding, patient partner and I wouldn't change it for anything. . .

Now I get to pass AWESOME award on to seven other bloggers that have inspired me, supported me or ones that I'd simply like to recognize. Some of my recipients have already received this award, but that just shows how totally AWESOME they are and maybe you need to check them out!

1. Karen at Ladybug, Ladybug fly away home. Karen's blog was one of the first that I started reading when I began blogging. She was waiting for her daughter Aspen and her story was so compelling to me. She then became a big support to me and we found a common affinity for wine. :)

2. Jayme at You Fill Me With Joy. Jayme and I hit it off right away and she was a strong force for me while we had our delays while waiting for Wesley. Every photo that Jayme posts of her daughter Joye is cuter than the next - they're so expressive! Brian and I joke about how one day Wesley and Joye will meet and fall in love.

3. Christy #1 at Richardson Happenings. What I like about Christy's blog is that not only does she update on her daughters June and Ava, but she also posts fresh/raw recipes and information on CSA (community supported agriculture) which is a very hot topic in many areas (especially where I live). Go Christy!!!

4. Christy #2 at Three Little Monkeys Jumping on the Bed. Christy is patiently waiting for her referral and in doing so, I've been inspired by her cheerful support of other adoptive moms/blogger friends along the way. I remember when she was going out of town right before Brian and I were anticipating our TC and she posted on her blog a special note hoping that we get some "good news" while she's gone. Whenever I check into her blog, it always seems like she's wishing other families well and/or praying for friends. She's a good person.

5. Pixie at Cheese Curds and Kimchi. Pixie came along while we were in South Korea I believe. I was able to catch up with her blog once we got back home and somewhat settled. Talk about a versatile blog - this gal has it! And, let me just tell you - she and her husband, Brian and myself will have to talk one day about the mid-century modern furniture. . .

6. Kelly at Jon & Kelly + Max. I know, I know, you've gotten this award like 10 times - j/k! But, I have to recognize! You and Jon have been a big part of my Blog World and especially right before Brian and I traveled you two were a part of our Adoption World. Kelly, you have obviously touched a lot of people (myself included) and I know we've talked about meeting up one day and I don't doubt that. Thank you for everything :)

7. Last but not least it's another fabulous gal that's been recognized before, but she's new to me and I think she's super! It's Grace at Chois-R-Us. She's got a great sense of humor, her blog always has her personality integrated into her posts and then her fabulous craft projects (now turned into her own Etsy Shop!). Grace, I'm glad that we found one another and I can't wait until you meet your sweet Choi Boy!

That's it all - sorry if it was a bit long. Thanks for reading and hanging in there for these amazing women, moms and friends. They're so worth it!

Wordless Wednesday - Zittel Farms Pumpkin Patch 10/17

Wesley's 1st Haircut

Each day after I get Wesley dressed we go into his bathroom for the routine of brushing his hair and then brushing his teeth. He gets the biggest kick out of both and LOVES to look at himself in the mirror. He's a total ham - especially when I say to him, "Look at the handsome boy!" What Wesley wasn't realizing was the disaster going on in the back of his head meaning his hair.

To begin with, the poor kid doesn't have much hair and what he does have is very fine. Then, there's this big patch of bald. It's like what infants have the first say 6 months or so from being in carriers, swings, etc. Well, he's 16 months and still has one. We're pretty sure he rubs his head back and forth at night (one of the few self soothing things he's done since he came home). And, lastly - the pièce de résistance is the long hair at the base of his neck. It's basically a mullet. I've tried to control it and there's no way of polishing this mess. So, the only solution was a trim.

My hairstylist Marisa graciously offered to do it whenever we had time to stop by. So, this past Thursday we decided to take her up on her offer so that he could start daycare off looking snazzy. We started off with an introduction between Marisa (who is also a mom to an adorable little boy named Grayson) and Wesley. Then, I put on a smock to protect my clothes and put Wesley on my lap. I came prepared with one of Wesley's favorite board books, Dr. Seuss's "The Foot Book" to keep him distracted. We dove right into the book and Marisa started cutting. Wesley was a little aware of what she was doing, but more like annoyed - almost like there was a fly swarming around his head. He did really well and within a matter of minutes, we were done!

Here are a few photos of the afternoon -
The "before" shot. It's one hot mess.

He has no idea what he's in for. . .

Hey wait! What are you doing?

Thank goodness for Dr Seuss.

Almost done!

The "big boy" haircut.

Wesley is showing you the "side view."

A closeup in case you didn't get enough of me :)

Last Week Home :(

This is my last week home with Wesley before I go back to work full-time. I really didn't know how I would deal with it once the time came, but now that it's this close I'm really not o.k. I don't know if he's ready. Maybe I'm not ready. We just hit our 2 months home mark on the 4th, it just seems too soon. It doesn't help that Wesley's had a tough last two weeks. I know it sounds crazy, but it's as if he knows it's coming. It started out with him being very clinging then, the past few days nap time and bedtime (which have been going pretty smooth) have been really rough. It's like he's reverting back to how it was when we first arrived home. We've even seen some of the upsetting self-soothing/coping behaviors pop up which we haven't seen for some time. One thing that may have contributed to the difficulty with nap time/bed time is that we had back-to-back events Thursday and Friday. My brother got married and we had the rehearsal and wedding - both of which Wesley attended. It may have just been too much.

Back to daycare - I realize that being around other children will be good for him socially and developmentally, I'm just concerned about the attachment that we've all worked so hard on. I've been an avid reader of Patty Cogen's "Parenting Your Internationally Adopted Child" as many of my adoptive mom friends and although I take a lot of the adoption/parenting books with a grain of salt, this particular one has been extremely helpful. In terms of daycare, Patty's recommendation is to limit it to 4 hours or less and to not do it until the child has been home for 2 or more years. Well Patty, that's just not realistic for some of us. So, enter the guilt. Will our attachment be affected? Will things change when he comes home to us at the end of the day? According to Patty, Wesley will get to daycare and most likely end up reverting back to his coping skills and thus will be unable to move forward. THIS is what keeps me awake at night.

We're going to the daycare facility tomorrow (Tuesday) for a test drive to see how Wesley interacts with the other kids and the teachers. I will be there with him the entire time. All I can think of is how tough the last few days have been (my mom got a taste of it today when she was over to help out - sorry Mom). Then, if all goes well (fingers crossed) I come back a day or two later and drop him off for a few hours to let him be there without me - YIKES! So, we'll see how it goes. . .

I know that all moms for the most part have anxiety when bringing their child to daycare for the first time. But you throw in the loss suffered, the grieving, etc. experienced by a child that has been adopted internationally and it's a whole new ballgame. I just can't get over the fact that I'm somehow adding to the stress he's already suffered in his short lifetime. :(

16 Months. . .

We celebrate our Little Peanut turning 16 months today. I can't believe how fast the time has gone by. It seemed like it was moving relatively slow for awhile or at the very least I felt like I had soooo much more time left with him before I had to go back to work and the inevitable would come. . . daycare. And, now I'm facing the final weeks home with him. It seems like yesterday I was just counting the final six weeks and now all of the sudden BAM! We JUMPED to three in the blink of an eye.

The weather has been very hot these past few days (98-100 degrees) so we stayed in today and took a few photos to commemorate the "Sweet 16 Month."

He looks so old to me here :(
LOVE this smile :)
Excuse the drool - it's been non-stop since we came home in August!!!
Trying to escape the "photo shoot."

Wesley experienced a few "firsts" in this past month (well, firsts with us at least). He's been babbling quite a bit but no English up until now. We haven't spoken or encourage any Korean since we brought him home (for various reasons/recommendations). He now says, "Da-Da" and "Cat" but alas, no "Mommy" so apparently I rank third behind Brian and our two cats. Brian is convinced that he's saying "Yellow" but I beg to differ. Our pediatrician said that he'll probably start slowly and then look out - once the flood gates are opened, he'll be a talking machine.

Then this past Saturday, Wesley attended his first birthday party. My friend from work Teresa and her husband Mike hosted a 1st birthday party for their beautiful daughter Leah. They decided to do a traditional Doljabee ceremony where the child selects a particular object laid out for him/her to predict her fate/path in life. The objects range from money meaning the child will be wealthy to a stethoscope meaning that the child will be a doctor to a microphone meaning the child will go into the broadcasting industry or entertainment. We arrived and right out of the gate, Wesley recognized Teresa's mother-in-law speaking Korean and smiled. We weren't sure how he would react, but he seemed to be comforted. There was so much good food there and friendly people, we had a really nice time. Wesley tried some new foods and had a fun time watching the older kids play. Since we were not able to see or participate in Wesley's Dol, it was special to experience this with Leah. For the record, Wesley chose the microphone and Leah chose the stethoscope.

Now for some other updates:

Food
Tomorrow Wesley goes 100% off formula. He'll still be on the bottle, but no formula. We've been gradually weening him off of it and tomorrow is the day to cut the cord. We've also been working with the sippy cup and he's doing really well with milk and water. He's continuing to try new solids including: shells & cheese, scrambled eggs, whole grain waffles, etc. Tonight we actually tried fish sticks which was interesting but he dug them and worked through the chewing.

Sleep
This continues to be one of our areas of struggle. Just when we think we're onto a "routine" things seem to go off track some how. The good news is that we've bumped up Wesley's bedtime an hour or more. He was going to bed between 9pm-10pm when we arrived home. We've changed that to 8pm. We've also worked to somewhat eliminate his morning naps and bump up his afternoon nap from 2pm to 12noon. This should work better with what the daycare schedule does when he moves to the "big boy" room in a few months. The struggles are the random wake ups in the middle of the night. They just started happening within the past 2+ weeks. He's never done this before so I feel like I shouldn't be complaining when I know that other families have a much harder time, however we're just perplexed at why he's all the sudden doing this. We're thinking that it could be the "change" of Brian going back to work (even with him being in the house) or Wesley going through some toddler growing pains of sorts or he could be suffering some more grieving. The other recent struggle is the shortening of the afternoon nap. This is very recent. They have gone from 2-2 1/2 hours to 1 - 1 1/2 hours, which result in a very cranky little boy come 3-3:30pm and 5-5:30pm.

Walking
Nothing yet. He's so incredibly close. He now gets one of his walking toys, stands up on his own and starts cruising down the hallway in seconds. I mean, you turn your back and he's off! We call his the little daredevil because he'll be standing up and balancing on our legs while we're sitting and he'll just turn around and let go and fall. It's like he doesn't realize that we're not going to support him. Yikes!
Kisses
Ok, Brian would probably say that I'm sharing too much, but I think it's really cute so I don't care. Wesley understands "Kisses" and when I say, "Can you give Mommy kisses?" and I lean in to give him a kiss, he opens his mouth (as opposed to puckering) to give his style of a kiss. Then when you connect with a "kiss" he giggles hysterically. It's really very cute.

To end this very long post, I'll have to share what I was thinking this morning while I was on our usual walk on the nature trail. I was reflecting on the long journey Brian and I have been through (as have others) to get to this point in our lives. After coming off of a somewhat difficult week with Wesley (last week) I vowed moving forward to be more patient, understanding and to keep top of mind what is really important. THIS is what we always wanted. HE is what we always wanted. There are going to be difficult times. There are going to be times when we're tired. There are going to be times when we're not sure what he wants. There are going to be times when other things will have to slip. As long as we love him, we love one another, the rest will fall into place.

Wesley loves the swing at his Grandy & Pops' house (my mom & dad's)