10 Months & Retail Therapy

Wesley turned 10 months old yesterday. The family was over at our place to celebrate Brian's birthday (which was on the 25th) so it was a happy day. Saturday was a different story. I don't know if some of the other adoption moms that are waiting are experiencing this but I'm really emotional lately. Like hormonal emotional. Like crazy hormonal emotional! So, I'm driving to my Saturday morning guitar lesson and for no reason I start to tear up. No, no, NO! I try to stop myself, but the tears start coming. Oh my gosh, what is going on? I can't go in and see my guitar teacher and have a melt down! Luckily, he was running late and I was able to get myself together and have a good practice.

So, then I decided I need a distraction after that. Ummmm, SHOPPING! Now with the delay, I had a few outfits that I needed to exchange, so I decided to head out to the mall. I picked up bigger sizes and picked up a few more things. Little boys clothes are so cute now. They literally look like mini Brian clothes! The only frustrating thing is that I wasn't sure about the size versus season of clothes depending on when he'll actually come home. But, I figured I'd be fine. I quickly got in a good mood and couldn't wait to bring home the treasures I had found to show Brian. I'm sending a care package out tomorrow or Wednesday and now we're trying to figure out what to send in the ever-important 1st Birthday care package at the end of May. That's going to be a tough one - I can't believe he won't be here. I'm anticipating some SERIOUS retail therapy for that one. . .

All You Need Is Love

Sometimes it's hard when things aren't going the way that you planned to take a moment, look around and see the blessings and the gifts in your life. In the past few weekends, I've had two showers to celebrate the arrival of our Little Peanut. The first was thrown by some great friends (a.k.a. The Craft Group) of my Mom/family, the second by some of my best girlfriends - we labeled them the "Dream Team." I will have to admit once we received the "news" that we wouldn't be traveling until late Summer, I was a bit worried about attending these two showers. What was I going to say to everyone? Was it strange to be celebrating when our time-line to pick up Wesley is not as close as we originally thought?

Well, my fears were immediately put to rest with the first shower from The Craft Group. It was a wonderful, intimate shower with a collective group of fabulous women. Once I explained to everyone our situation they all were so supportive and positive. And, it was amazing to experience the excitement that they all had to get our sweet boy home.

Below is a photo of the tasty cupcakes the Craft Group served - Mmmmmm!


This past weekend Brian and I attended our Co-Ed Shower thrown by the "Dream Team." Both Brian and I were totally blown away by the creativity, thoughtfulness and consideration that these gals put into the party. It was just what we needed to celebrate Wesley versus dwell on the fact that there is a delay in our travel time. Our guests showed both us and Wesley so much love and support that I literally was brought to tears at times.

It made me realize that we are so unbelievably blessed to have such great friends and family in our lives and that Wesley has so much love waiting for him here at home. And, there is a lot of love being sent to him in Korea in the meantime. :)

Here's a photo of Brian and me with the Dream Team.

Words of Inspiration

Brian works with a woman who had a very difficult time 2 years ago. In the same year, she lost her husband and one of her parents. I couldn't even imagine. She managed to handle both losses with grace and courage. I've never met her (she works in another state) yet, between Brian's stories, descriptions and through reading her Christmas cards over the years, I feel like I know her. Anyway, this past Christmas she included in her card two passages from the bible.

When Brian and I read them, we agreed that they spoke to us. So, I thought that I would share them being that they are very timely considering the wait times for many of us and thoughts that leave us wondering why things happen the way they do. :)

Jeremiah 29:11. . . For I know the plans I have for you, says The Lord. They are plans for good and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.

Proverbs 3:5. . . Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding.

Update on Time-line, the Wait Continues. . .

I couldn't stand it anymore so I broke down and called our adoption agency today inquiring about our time-line. They told me that the August referrals (assignments) are being filed now to received their exit permits and that they should be traveling in 3-4 weeks (all going before mid April). They also said that the way things have been going the past 2 months, the agency in Korea (Eastern) has been processing about 1 month's worth of referrals per month.

They are going under the assumption that this will be the case moving forward. If so, that puts us traveling sometime in August (our referral was in November, but they actually go by the acceptance date which was Dec. 1). Yes, I wrote August. They are holding out hope that things will pick up, but if we've learned anything from the China adoption program, I think it's better to be prepared for the worst case scenario and if it picks up then fabulous.

The update was actually quite a surprise to us. We were well aware of the backlog of families who had not yet traveled from 2009, but we didn't think that it was going to result in this much of a delay. I took the news particularly hard. Wesley turns 1 on May 28, so we will miss that. Brian has been great - extremely supportive and very positive.

I am very aware of the "big picture" and know that we have a son and that ultimately Wesley is in good hands with his foster mom, but I can't help the disappointment that I'm feeling. We just want him home so we can start our life with him that we have so desperately wanted for so long. But, good things are worth waiting for and we will do our best to remain patient. We love you Wesley.

The Boy of My Dreams (Literally)

Wesley is always on my mind and in my heart, but for the past few nights I've dreamt about my sweet boy. These dreams are incredibly realistic. We're in South Korea, meeting him for the first time, he's smiling and reaching out to us. I pray that it goes this smooth when we actually do get to meet him :)
So, the wait time and bringing him home is clearly on my mind and now my subconscious. I don't wake up sad in fact in an odd way it's like he's visiting me to say that he's OK and telling me to be patient (as corny as that sounds). Maybe I'm grasping at straws here to find some kind of solace during this difficult wait, but hey - a girl has to do what a girl has to do, right? I guess the phrase "Sweet Dreams" is taking on a whole new meaning for me these days. . .

Waiting Wednesday

One of the adoption moms that I know through the agency and another from the "blog world" have invented "Waiting Wednesdays" - it's a list that is posted on Wednesdays meant to pass the time during this rough patch we're all in right now. Each Wednesday takes on a new "theme" (as far as I understand). Today (although it's the end of the day) I thought that I'd join in. Here's my list:

Top 10 Things I'm Looking Forward To With Wesley

1. First thing obviously, I can't wait to meet him and give him a HUGE hug and kiss (and Brian too).

2. Introducing him to his Grandy and Pops (my Mom and Dad). They've been waiting a long time to meet their first grandchild.

3. Introducing him to his Nanny (Brian's mom) she's the best; an already experienced grandmother, she will have a lot to offer.

4. Seeing him reacting to our cats Niles & Frasier and vice versa. They are our "babies" - we adopted them from a shelter and they've only known us. I don't know if Wesley has been exposed to cats - I'm pretty sure that they're not pet-worthy in Korea.

5. Hearing him laugh (a true belly laugh) for the first time. I think a child's laugh is the best sound in the world.

6. Meeting our friends and their kids, especially those that are close to his age (Kira, Ke'ala & Quinn) and seeing him interact with them.

7. I can't wait to rock him to sleep for the first time.

8. The first time that he reaches for me to pick him up.

9. Hearing him say "Ma Ma" or "Mommy" or any version of the two and actually mean me :).

10. Watching him feel comfortable with both Brian and I and realize that he is home. . .